All aboard our radio comedy
An original radio comedy by Ian Kidd
Roaches Coaches is small bus company, run by middle-aged manager Keith Roache who inherited the firm from his father. Keith is going through a messy divorce and the bus company is struggling financially. His employees are a bunch of wasters who don’t make his life very easy.
A bungled attempt at arranging finance ends up with Keith being in hock to a loan shark, and he has to explore different ideas to get out of debt and save the business, none of which are particularly successful.
Alongside the attempts to prevent the depot closing, the principal characters are dealing with personal issues: trying to get a man, trying to lose weight, trying to kick off a Hollywood career, and trying to come to terms with moving from a remote island to the big smoke.
There are 8 main characters and a variety of incidental characters who pop up from time to time on the buses.
Keith Roache (Nigel Pope)
Owner/manager. Mid 40s. Inherited the family business that he’s now struggling to keep afloat. Struggles to be an authority figure and therefore is always let down by his staff. Going through a messy divorce.
Carol Jackson (Sarah Walker)
Keith’s PA. Aged 50 to 60. Pleasant, nice to chat to, gets on well with everyone but hopeless at her job. Spends quite a big chunk of her day reading celebrity magazines. Makes a mess of all Keith’s instructions.
Jimmy Gibson (Kevin Boland)
Early 60s. Fat, grumpy, moany and stuck in his ways, Jimmy is a bus driver who hates passengers as much as he hates change.
Kenny Ferguson (Andy Barr)
Late 30s. Thinks he is a metrosexual but in reality, he is a sleazy philanderer and a bit of a ned. Loves gym, football and women. Has wife and 3 kids. Drives a 15-year old BMW.
Mags Neilson (Jeannie Woodburn)
Mid 40s, always trying to lose weight and get a man. Worked there for a long time and has a love/hate relationship with Kenny.
Laurence Nolan (Ian Kidd)
Late 20s, dreams of being an actor. He is very camp and has had a difficult relationship with his father.
William Mcleod (Rosellen Dick)
Early 20s, and has just arrived from Shetland. Lived a sheltered life and is constantly surprised by the pace of modern life on the mainland. Has an accent no-one can understand.
Mark the Shark (John Steele)
Middle aged – hard man who operates a loan shark business. Sarcastic and dangerous.
Narrator (Anna Foran)
Our narrator introduces each scene with a little hint of sarcasm, just when the moment needs it.
As Roaches’ coaches drive around the community, the drivers encounter all types of humanity: tramps, smutty pensioners, police officers, tarty women, yummy mummies, neds, tourists, bus spotters and even the Fintry Feminists.
Episode 1 :: Bridge Into Trouble Waters
Download the script here: Episode 1 - Bridge Into Troubled Waters
Cast (in order of appearance):
Theme song - Stuart Kidd
The Narrator - Anna Foran
Carol - Sarah Walker
Jimmy - Kevin Boland
Keith - Nigel Pope
William - Rosellen Dick
Kenny - Andy Barr
Laurence - Ian Kidd
Christopher - Stuart Dick
Lady Gallacher - Gerry Eckersley
Tarty Woman on Bus - tbc
Young Woman on Bus - Heather Stewart
Pauline - tbc
Mark The Shark - John Steele
Produce - Sam Yoffe
Assistant Director - Laura Cranstoun
Directed and Written by - Ian Kidd